ENGLISH VERSION of Cuando el interior no quiere comunicarse
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
I would say that we all spend a greater or lesser extent. Not wanting to explain. What those around us make us feel, despite the redundancy, they understand how we feel.
How difficult, if not impossible is to get that combination of sounds "I know how you feel."
It would be logical that if someone has gone through what you, empathize with you, because of course, you say "I've been there."
It might seem, almost sinful, wait, coveting a person, leave aside their experiences, and just watching, listening, channeling your situation inside and enfoncando what you know, I could tell you "No wonder you feel like that. "
I have been discussing these terms, these issues from time immemorial. This need, this cruel way to feel the affection of others, is impossible dissociation between love and understanding.
I do not know that fact, in my childhood, led to these impossible combinations, love, understanding, caring, understanding, respect, empathy, receive, give
When one, in one of "those" days, it is revealed, the patient falls below the minimum, shows fussy, all staff are surprised, alarms are triggered, of course, they'll appreciate, and want to help, instead of wondering what need, and give you the solution, "take off and to feel well", or intend to situations such as "Quiet, and will go away, and tell me if you need anything."
I guess I understand that to everything there is to pay a price. Being always available, always putting the other cheek, not to require certain changes, because deep "understand" means that when one day, or more, you've given up, something happened that you've hit bottom, you do not know and if you know what is not important, and it is not because it is not, but because it is repeated, like a karma touched you, it has happened so often that one cares more, for I'm sorry boy, " you are the hard, you do not have to watch over you ", because of course, that's the role I took in my relationships with people, I hard, the rock, he who resists, the enduring, the comprehensive .. .. then the other party gets the other role. So many times we have seen the film, which is impossible, that one day, to turn the papers, "I do drive now?, No, no, no, take the guy?, No no no, sorry, call extra to see if it comes ...."
What has happened so often?
Again, a person is not careful to watch the details, because it assumes that it is not necessary, at the time of acting, its own problems of seized and clear, no red light comes on, why?, No There, no one has taught him that even if one is a strong person, does not mean that you will not grieve hurt bad manners, bad for the consequences, even tricky situations that arise, and to my mind perfectly understandable, then and only Therein lies the issue.
Not only suffer if you do not understand that up. Of course, this vicious cycle, when you're full of energy, which is almost always, is it, really bill. The Mission in action.
But sooner or later, there is always a day that energy is not adequate, spend little, so little that you remember not to require, and to train people, which in the end seems more than necessary. Something like a drill, get better reactions, response times, etc.
I would say that this is the worst of the situation. Lack of attention to what is hurting me too bad as others. I may not sink, perhaps, does not affect me in my self-esteem, I might not harm myself, but it saddens me, grabs me tranquility that we adore, I lose the will to deal with those close.
Why?, Because I demand them at the time, so I never made demands. I care, show me, those combinations of the talking at first.
That's where the sadness and floods everything, and starts the hardest part. For even commenting that I'm sad that something hurts my mood, relatives, nearby, does not know or not know how to achieve the much-discussed, combinations, and I that I have the patience under minimum surly show me the truth I do not relish the idea of giving a talk on how to get to me. I know I should, but if I have to explain, after I talked about how many times, how I act in so many situations, I feel just as sad or worse, because to be on this side of the requirement, I explain calmly, patiently, and logically, who will be able to understand.
Curious loop. The most curious of all is that two weeks ago paved the way for a friend, talking about many of these ideas. Oh, missionary, what a great communicator when the problem is not yours, you know break the reality in many parts that everyone understands each give their parts, except of course when you've got the problem, you wear the sadness, the lack of patience you have, you give up and have not begun, curious, curious.
Seeing how others act, the first thing would clear the way by showing less understanding towards other human beings, with their problems but mostly with his neglect to take care of this, that conversation here.
Should be much less permissive, if you see a day when I will not be, and that day becomes a number, there should be the bar.
I'm sure many people who have the closest presumode not give the kind, and of course, as the key day, that, the day that if I need care, at least one of them, could not require nothing, would not be.
Because let's face it, if you're always there to take care of yourself, totally not going to go anywhere. You put up with it all, because as you are so understanding. Well, the truth, I imagine, it is time to close the kiosk again.
All that makes me sad, really sad to know that I am well surrounded, and that was my fault not show less pandering to the faults, you should do as human beings do more mundane. "Until you ask me for forgiveness does not count on me", you should start practicing, I will go from sad to feel stupid, but I think that feeling is less harmful than the other.
Setting limits to people. What a harsh reality, so stupid that is, people we see when we have something negative to another, but apparently not, because I do no more to be marked by blood and iron when damage their "internal" Zounds, well I know, because the consequences are reflected there quickly, whether shouting, the finger, tears, dirty looks, mood swings, withdrawal of the word, hang up, ask you to leave, insults, to define a whole jargon that seems to be that I must begin to wonder, because hazmitámoslo, am out of the guild, if I want to be inside, I have to use their language, their communication systems.
And to think that's necessary so that my relatives take care of me, protect me when I feel vulnerable, I tucked in, it's true, is it worth it?.
Then today, yesterday, before yesterday, I feel vulnerable, and especially the strong, greatly disturbs us, feel so weakens us in our belief that we all, we passed everything. I am strong, I know, I'm not ashamed, or make me feel less, to assume the feeling of vulnerability. But when I see how easy it was for my relatives to take care of at the moment, and instead, they get frustrated not to get to my mind, is upset because my sadness lingers, or because in my state, my patience exhausted the possibilities of do not criticize their behavior, and is not, of course, constructive criticism, and are spoiled to you, that does not seem logical, even more reason to give you the sadness grip you like a leech. Others opt for the distance, the best remedy for not taking sides, or remove you or give you, so naturally there will be no confrontation whatsoever, in part, I appreciate if you do not know what to do, it is best to do nothing, but I say, in part, because gentlemen, if a person is sad, please, just needed to accompany her, and if it becomes excessively dramatic, or even that seems to enjoy being sad, limitémosnos to accompany her, "and you will , yes, but it will go alone. "
And for the record, I believe that many things must pass alone. Right. But, of course, with support like this, no wonder that people have already assumed that the most to lose if they are accompanied, and clear, at least it does not lose more than they have already lost.
My mother always told me "If you get to demand, you're alone, no one will ever size, you have to accept your friends are."
Thank you, mother, true, but I followed your advice all my life and I'm still frustrated by check, to accept, understand, understand, empathize with my friends, associates, is causing confusion with which I have to eat, swallow, assume, and finally down to my own loneliness.
Bad thing, this writing at night. I'm sure tomorrow I'll see everything differently, but now I feel is reflected at 5 am, I have every right in the world, that if the sunrise change my feelings, because they are welcome.
No hay comentarios:
Publicar un comentario